Goodbye, Skinny Jeans

GOODBYE,

SKINNY JEANS

If you have been following me on Instagram, you would have heard that I have drank the Kool Aid

and got myself a road bike a month ago. It's something I have reserved to get into in my forties in anticipation of mid-life, but I guess when you're with a talented cyclist as The Dutch,

being inspired to get into the sport myself this early is a little bit inevitable. My bike is a

gorgeous aluminum Bianchi (carbon fork, Shimano 105 gear set) which I may have

bought because of its color (ha!). 200 miles into it, I am smitten. The bike is solid yet

very responsive. It won't win in the lightest bike category, but it has a brawny edge hidden by that signature, if effeminate, celeste color.

It couldn't ask for anything more for a first road bike!

I have been mountain biking for a couple of years now, but the speed of a road bike and its

ability to go long distances with such remarkable ease brings a different thrill and challenge

altogether. I love climbing and I didn't expect the feeling of climbing on a less chunky bike

with skinny tires would go that much faster. Sometimes, I feel like I'm cheating on my mountain

bike when I'm caught in ear-to-ear grins on my road bike, but I do not discount the fact that

mountain biking (climbing, gearing, endurance, etc.) has definitely prepared me for road cycling.

There is something (mentally) impossible about conquering a mountain using sheer

physical force (your own). And to summit a mountain - regardless of how low or high it is -

is always a validating feeling that I am stronger than I have ever believed myself to be.

And that kind of knowing only comes with doing.

And the bonus is it carries over to over aspects of my life - the idea of letting go of

any pre-conceived judgments about anything before I actually experience it. And what

that does it cracks your life wide open to invite all sorts of experiences in! Instead of:

"No, I won't try that. I probably won't be good at it" or "No, I can't possibly do that",

most experiences are met with "yes" after "yes", even though failure is seemingly imminent.

When The Dutch said we'll do an after-work ride on a Thursday in the Sierras at a

place called Boca, I didn't hesitate to go even after being warned of a segment

called "The Wall" where many a cyclists met the dreaded "man with the hammer".

Well, this "Wall" is an ominous vertical block of asphalt that was long and brutal,

especially for someone like me who had just barely sat on a road bike saddle.

But with a "bitch, please" bravado, err.. attitude, I conquered the infamous Wall

without blowing up. It was a very proud moment indeed.

Now what they didn't detail in the "Manual for Chicks who Want to Overachieve on a Road Bike"

was that your thighs will exponentially multiply in width and weight.

Can I just have a chick moment? Oh. My. Gosh. What happened to my thigh gap?

(Ok, thank you. I needed that.)

I have been reflecting on this for a few days now since it is crazy that I would diminish

the importance of my achievements (and my humble collection of Strava trophies - lol)

because my body is changing and it no longer fits the mold of what a "typical" woman's size

and weight ought to be. I never had any real body issues before, but becoming athletic and

strong has really challenged that. The skinny jeans have to go into early retirement.

Society (or is just fashion magazines and beauty brands?) expects women to be skinny waifs

and you know what? I am done with that. It is stupid. Beauty does not reduce as you go

up in size charts. Men don't even have the same pressure so have thigh gaps, it's ridiculous!

All those magazines and blogs perpetuating and defining beauty as only those who are of a

certain size and waistline, y'all could shove that definition of women up your skinny asses.

And to girls coming of age, don't buy into it. Brains will trump superficial beauty in the

long run. Read. Study hard. Engage. Be curious. Find a sport you will excel in.

Aim for a meaningful life outside of materialism and commercialism. After catching

myself desiring to be the size I once was, I slammed the brakes on this dangerous

path to self-loathing and decided that I would rather be strong than skinny any damn day.

Yes, I have thunder thighs that could embarrass you, but without them being gargantuan,

I wouldn't be able to squash you on climbing Wall after Wall, would I?

#strongnotskinny

#welcome #adventure #cycling #peptalk