37 Cartwheels

37.

Before I turned thirty, I kept serious tabs on my age and how old I was.

But after I turned that corner marked 3-0, I suddenly stopped keeping count. Not that I was in denial because there was nothing to deny about

about being in my thirties; this has seriously been my best decade yet.

In my haste though, I have went on the last year thinking I was only 35 and one

day stopping to do the math and realizing that this year, I'm actually, well, 37.

It's silly how we envision how our futures would play out, but more often than not,

reality proves stranger than fiction. Our minds could only concoct so much,

but the rest, really is beyond it. For one, I never expected 37 to feel like this.

Strong. Nondescript in some ways, but solid in many ways, too.

The last couple years have defined that happiness manifests

in the giddy, but also in the quiet Sunday afternoons.

True, this number doesn't sound sexy by any account,

but trust me when I say that right now, I couldn't

imagine being anything else than

37.

THE AGE OF 'I AM STRONG'.

I have never been the athlete, but 36 has been my strongest year yet

and 37 is already promising to be up there, too. I have had rad moments on

the mountain hiking (remember this from the Alps last year?) and on a mountain bike,

but I have recently just got on a road bike and there is nothing more empowering than

realizing that you can start new things and feel accomplished riding up a steep hill strong.

I started out my birthday by celebrating life and good health doing what I love.

I mountain biked Tahoe's Flume Trail which I have wanted to do for a long time now.

It was a heavy ride starting with a 4-mile category 2 ascent, but riding along tall cliffs

overlooking the majesty of Lake Tahoe and the Sierras was just pure joy.

THE AGE OF 'I AM DOING THINGS THAT MATTER TO ME'.

This blog has been such a wonderful experiment and outlet on creativity.

I have challenged myself to be better - a better writer, a better photographer,

a better content creator - for no other reason than for the sake of seeing what

happens when one applies oneself to passion. I have learned so many things

about myself, about vulnerability and exposing myself to failure, and I would

like to think I am the better for it. It has always been my lofty desire to

empower others to go after their own adventures - whatever that means

to anyone consuming content here - and the feedback I get, often

unexpectedly, makes this work much more meaningful.

THE AGE OF 'I KNOW WHAT TRUE FRIENDSHIP MEANS'.

I've lost people along the way and that is just absolutely a-okay

because people change, and the reality is, it is normal to outgrow people.

But the ones who are still around are the ones that matter because

they are the ones meant for the long haul anyway.

THE AGE OF BEING ABLE TO AFFORD THINGS

BUT NOT GIVING IN TO EVERY SINGLe WHIM

BECAUSE YOU DON'T NEED THOSE TO VALIDATE YOU.

Which is in itself a privilege that I do not want to take for granted.

Some would say that I am lucky to have the career and the life that I have,

but perhaps only I could understand that it did not come without making difficult

choices and sacrifices. I don't want to sound like I'm trivializing what everyone else

could be going through, but I don't want to diminish the fact either that I too came

from very little. I would like to think that those times I would take the public bus in Manila

(yes, those non-AC ones even), standing since there's no seating left, after a day of work

and grad school - I would like to think that those days prepared me for what was coming.

And in a sense, going through all that makes everything more meaningful today.

THE AGE OF 'I CAN'T GET AWAY WITH EATING BREAD'.

That I cannot eat everything without consequence is a first world problem, I get it.

But trying hard to undo my DNA's predisposition to diabetes and heart disease is a serious

effort for me. The older I get, the more I miss seeing 115 on the scale. BUT, I also want to say that on behalf of all women out there who are strong, us with thunder thighs who

do not fit the mold of the delicate waifs they sold to us and that is perfectly okay.

They can have skinny. We're fine with strong.

THE AGE OF I'M STARTING TO SHOW MY AGE.

I used to get excited when I get carded at bars in my 30's. Welllll, I don't get

carded anymore and I don't really go to bars anymore either. But i do spend

more time than necessary or productive (30 seconds) figuring out what's up

with these gray hairs that sprout from nowhere. This is about the age I do

start contemplating if I should go salt-and-pepper and just let them

gray hair have at it, or if artificial hair color is something that denies me

the privilege of owning my late 30's - every single gray strand of it.

THE AGE OF I DON'T REALLY GIVE A DAMN.

But then, at the end of the day, the sincerely beautiful thing about

being my age is that the foundation has been built, it has been tested,

and survived some major earthquakes. For the most part, nothing keeps me up at

night or makes me flinch. There's really not too much entanglements from unnecessary

drama and complications. I go to work, I come home and ride my bike, make

dinner, blog sometimes, and then go to bed.

I mean, having been through tumultuous times in my twenties trying to figure out

who I am and what deeply matters, pinching pennies and trying to make rent,

I have earned the gift of perspective and discernment of what is worthy of

investing my precious energy in and what isn't.

Happy birthday to me.

Please help yourself to cake and a glass of wine for me and and together lets wish

for world peace and the end of global violence and hatred.

And if you're still reading this, know that getting older holds

so much promise! Don't let them tell you otherwise!

xoxo

*

Photography: Jenny Sinocruz (Instagram: jsfavthings)

Shot on location at Presidio San Francisco

Featuring Clarks

#welcome #travel #adventure